The Final Throes of Peace

Americans who still want to pre-pay peace's funeral are in the minority -- and they must really hate it. The Bush league's histrionics-meter has risen from orange to red on the blogs, and the nastiness is the nastiest I've seen yet.

A writer for Haaretz.com, Bradley Burston, posted a chilling view of the Israel/Palestine conflict titled "Ten ways to make sure that peace stays dead," which so totally mirrors our own Conservative/Liberal fracas, it's prophetic.

We know the Middle East conflict is older than the Bible -- remember the Philistines, AKA the Peleshti in the New Testament? They're the modern-day Palestinians. The ancient Pharisees rebuked by Jesus happen to be the Farsi-speaking Persian people today.

So, the English language changed their names. To protect...? Historically, civilizations in the Middle East had never been interested in sharing, but Bradley Burston's blog wouldn't be published by Haaretz if there weren't others like him -- he sees it as a place where peace goes to die. Is pre-paid the way to go?

CHOOSING BURIAL OR CREMATION?

Burston's pleas to conquer death vs. diplomacy attitudes in the Middle East also apply to the festering conservatives vs. liberals blather online. Here is Scoppertop's Americanized-Version of his observations, Ten Ways to Start an American Civil War:

1. MY side has the only valid arguments. YOUR side is lying, stupid, crazy, or all three.

2. The men, women, and children on YOUR side do not deserve equal respect, quality of life, nor even to share the planet's resources with MY side.

3. The dead and wounded military, civilians, and surviving families on YOUR side do not deserve honor or respect, but on MY side, they are true heroes and worthy of sympathy.

4. The word 'Terrorism' only describes what is done to the people on MY side BY the people on YOUR side. MY side only practices 'acts of self-defense.'

5. YOUR side should happily accept the consequences of inferiority to MY side. If YOUR side fights back, you will be punished.

7. YOUR side's strategy will destroy America and surrender us all to the terrorists. MY side's strategy is the intelligent way to manage the war on terror.

8. MY side's most-extreme policies must be followed or members will risk the label of leaning toward YOUR side. YOUR side's most-extreme policies are insane and undeniably followed by all members.

9. YOUR side's accusations and threats to MY side are crimes. MY side's accusations and threats to YOUR side are perfectly legal and directly proportional to the closeness of MY side to the truth.

10. YOUR side is responsible for the escalation of horrors in Iraq. Cause and effect does not apply to actions on MY side.

GIVING YOUR FAMILY AND LOVED ONES "PEACE OF MIND"--WHAT A CONCEPT

Both sides can't be correct! Their only successes are attacking each other. MY side and YOUR side members should revise and adopt the Haaretz articles policy for posting comments. Here are five "Grounds for Deletion" on their Talkback Forum:

"1. Racist remarks, as well as slurs on the basis of religion, ethnicity and gender.
2. Use of the terms Nazi, Hitler, ethnic cleansing, to describe the actions and policies of Israelis,
Palestinians or other parties to the Israel-Arab conflict.
3. Disparaging remarks, personal attacks, vulgarities and profanities directed at other participants in the forum.
4. Advocacy of violence against individuals or religious, ethnic or racial groups, including statements which may be
construed as urging attacks on leaders, officials, security forces or civilians.
5. Use of the phrase: "There are no Palestinians" or derivatives thereof."

Conservatives and Liberals hoping to avoid Civil War II could at least take the time to read Burston's article and accept his invitation to civilized discourse. Here's the link, or click on the title above:

http://www.haaretz.com/hasen/spages/790722.html

NOTIFYING YOUR NEXT OF KIN, IF ANY?

We're either headed for pre-paid Armageddon or an end to all armed conflict. Not both.

After Vietnam, a popular bumper sticker stated, "If Guns were Outlawed, Only Outlaws would have Guns." The last time I commented on an article, I said the only way to achieve justice and endless peace is to criminalize the manufacture of all weapons. The author later added the comment, "and lock up the criminals in office."

I forgot to add, "and destroy the existing weapons," but it's so true. How the weapons go from 'existing' to 'destroyed' is our choice and our future.

Visit the Whacks Museum!

We're putting our best butts forward! Grab your paddle and play!

The newest exhibit, Out With the Old SoD, is sure to please:

Donald Rumsfeld: Looks so alive, you'll swear his body is
still attached under the platter!

Inside the Red Room, each whack elicits a comment. Our faves:

George Allen: Macaca. It's what's for dessert.

Ken Blackwell: Special Delivery!

Conrad Burns: I'm breaking up with the landlord's daughter.

Mark Foley: I'm breaking up with the landlord's son.

Bill Frist: That depends upon the interpretation of the
word, "running."

Katherine Harris: Hmguppl-a-el-bel abb ruh-mon-ge-lai-lau.
Tu-ta-lu. (Translation from Tongues to English: "I'm going to
Rehab! Amen.")

Rick Santorum: I'm gonna wash that dog right outta my hair,
I'm gonna wash that dog right outta my hair...

Don Sherwood: F%@k the babysitter!
___________________________

Comments left from behinds in the Blue Room:

Clint Curtis: Whistleblowing is STILL against the law.

Harold Ford, Jr.: Don't call me, I'll call you.

John Kerry: Just say no to the speechwriter.

Ned Lamont: Hey, guv'nor, can you spare a dime?

Reader creations or suggestions encouraged. Satisfaction guaranteed or your country back.